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Baby making: why do you need to have a number?

June 5, 2014 by Shari

So many people I know talk about having a specific number of babies. As soon as you have a baby, people are asking you when you are having your next baby. More people throw in their advice on the number of children you should have – some prompt you to have more, some people tell you to stop. Why is the number of children you will have any of their business? 
In my mind I think that I would like to have four babies – four isn’t a number I have written in stone. I may be like Bern from Mamamia and stop at three… that’s when she knew her baby making days were over. 

But I would like to have the ability to leave that number open. I may like to have two or three or four or even five or six. It’s just what works with our family dynamics at the time – and really, it’s what God chooses to bless us with.

I’ve seen families grow up with only children, I’ve know how it works with pairs, I’ve come from a family of three children, Phillip’s brother has four and both of my parents were one of five. Heck, at my baby shower my Nan told me that I should have six.

I understand that times have changed from when my parents were growing up and it is harder to ‘keep up with the Jones’ ‘ whilst raising a larger family. It means bigger homes, bigger cars, more expensive school fees, fewer opportunities for extra curricula activities and probably less holidays.

It’s no longer a case where you paid full price for your first, half price for your second, a quarter of the price for your third and your fourth was free down at the local catholic school.

But there is just something about a large family that appeals to me.

I just love being a mum.

I know that being a stay-at-home-mum doesn’t appeal to everyone, and I realize that over time my thoughts may change on this as well. But that’s what I am open to change! And I feel that all mums should be able to change their minds without judgment.

You wanted to have a large family, but found the pressure of two under two too much… so stopped and that’s all you ended up having – THAT’S OKAY.

You wanted to have three, but your husband pushed for a fourth and you were blessed with twins… be proud of your family and ignore what negative Nancy’s have to say.

You always dreamed of a family but your career got in the way or you never found the right person to settle down with – YOU’RE NORMAL.

So let’s all just take a deep breathe before we make comment on another woman’s life choices – she doesn’t need a number of children and if she does have a number in mind, really, how is it any of your business?

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Filed Under: life, motherhood Tagged With: children, life choices, lifestyle, Mamamia, numbers, people's choices, pregnancy

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Hi, I’m Shari Wakefield and I am the creative director and social media manager behind the food/lifestyle blog GoodFoodWeek. I’m a mum to four beautiful boys, who spends her days working in corporate communications and her nights cooking up a storm in her kitchen. We reside in Sydney, Australiaread more

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I’ve been working with brands and writing sponsored content since 2010.
Some of the brands that I have worked with include; Foxtel, Tommee Tippee, Murray Valley Pork, Mater Mothers, Redbelly Citrus, Home Hello, Majestic Mushrooms, and Littlebean Organics.
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Shari from GoodFoodWeek

GoodFoodWeek started in 2008 as a way of sharing recipes with uni friends and family who were spread near and far. It has evolved over the years to contain my ramblings as I’ve searched for a house, planned the perfect veggie patch, stumbled through farmer’s markets with my eye half open (because you need to be there at 6am to get the fresh eggs), had babies, gathered family and friends around a shared table, laughed out loud and enjoyed life to the fullest! Read More…

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