Motherhood can be a lonely job {especially when family and friends live in another state}. Sometimes you’ll find a friend in another mother who is battling the same demons as you, and other times you will feel that just because some one is a mother, doesn’t always mean that you will be friends. But this month, I’m hoping that we can all find it in our hearts to offer up a little bit of extra kindness towards one another.
There is no one-way and there is no right way to raise a child. For example; some people will let their babies cry it out, some people will rock their babies to sleep until they’re just too heavy to do so with, and others will co-sleep. This is just a mere three options to sleep and there are many more {so let’s just say parenting minds differ a lot}.
The fact is that are many ways to raise a child and I feel that whatever works for you and your family is okay. But this isn’t the way everyone thinks – some people want to ram their parenting experiences and methods down your throat {I’ve spoken about the Kanye West type here}.
You come home from hospital with your bundle of joy and many Australian mother’s are directed to a ‘mother’s group’. In sleepless nights and cracked nipples you can find some solidarity – but as children grow and parenting styles establish you can sometimes find yourself not quiet fitting in with these ladies.
I saw one mother attend just one of our mother’s groups and when we started discussing breastfeeding I could see she was uncomfortable. She was bottle-feeding her baby, and although no one had said anything negative about it, she quickly exited the class and never came back. I wanted to approach the mother, but she left so quickly.
I wanted to say, ‘Hey Mama, you’re doing an awesome job’ – but I didn’t. And I am sorry that I didn’t.
As your family grows you change and adjust to the circumstances that are put before you. When you have add another baby into the mix it will inevitability get harder – but that’s no reason to put down another Mama who has less children.
I’ve been told so many times that ‘two is easy – have three or four and then you’ll see how difficult it can be’.
Okay, I can count… three would inevitability be more work then two. But in this moment, two comes with their own set of challenges.
Nevertheless, when my friend had her third, I tried to help her out with a delivery of fresh bread, morning tea {because what new Mama doesn’t miss the morning tea that hospital puts on}, and the offer of 30 minutes to wash her hair whilst I watched the kids.
I hope she heard, ‘Hey Mama, you’re doing an awesome job and I just want to help you out in any way that I can’.
Motherhood can be a lonely road and I just want the world to be a little kinder to one another this month {well from now on}. You don’t necessarily have to be best friends with the Mama to show some solidarity and kindness. She is just trying to do what she thinks is best for her baby in that moment of time.
