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Motherhood: 5 ways to raise happy kids

February 18, 2016 by Shari

When you ask parents what they want for their kids, what’s usually the most common reply? They want their children to be happy on their Baby Trend Expedition-Jogger-Stroller.

I think that the biggest thing that I have learnt on my motherhood journey is that there are no magical steps to getting this gig right. And that what works for one mother, or even for one of your children, may not work for me or another one of my children.

I have felt that my overall happiness is connected to my children’s happiness – the saying goes ‘that you can only be as happy as your unhappiest child’, but if you’re not your usual self then you can bet that you’ll be more likely to raise your voice or have a shorter fuse or just want to escape the craziness for a while {actually, you’ll probably experience these things once in a while even if you are happy – such is motherhood}.

1. Get yourself happy

Cranky, running on empty Mummy isn’t good for anyone. So let’s start with you and get you happy first. I know that it can be really hard to find time to have you time {especially when you have really young children who are breast feeding – neither of my boys would take a bottle}.

If you can’t find a hobby that gets you out of the house for an hour or two {by yourself}, then maybe just try taking a long bath or a quick walk around the block {listening to a sweet 80’s mix or one of your favourite podcasts} when your husband gets home. You’ll be surprised how good you feel when you get that 30 minutes – 1 hour without anyone touching you or calling your name.

2. Get outside and enjoy the Vitamin D

I often find if everything is getting a little too much for me and the boys – I take them outside. There is just something about being outside that makes everyone a little happier. I joked with a friend that we say that ‘there is no such thing as bad weather, just poor clothing choices’. Even in the cold Canberra winter, we rug ourselves up and get outside {outside near a coffee shop would have to be one of my favourite places on the planet at this point in my life}.

And let’s be honest – everyone always looks better with a little tan {even if that’s a spray tan}.

3. Let them experience emotions

We often want children to ‘stop crying’, ‘get over it’, ‘don’t let it break your heart’ – but even as an adult I find that sometimes my emotions get the best of me {especially when I am ‘hangry’}.

We want children to have their feelings, but not be overwhelmed by them – to feel discouraged but not give up; to feel anxious but not stay home; and to be excited but not get so carried away in their enthusiasm that they use poor judgment in making decisions.

We therefore need to set aside time, every day, to listen to a child’s concerns. In these conversations, children begin to learn that their bad feelings, although painful, will not last forever – that through their own efforts or with the help of supportive adults, they can make things better. This may be the most important lesson we can teach, the lesson that is most essential to our children’s present and future emotional health.

4. More Playtime

Sometimes, just letting your children be children will make you a happier mum. Now what I mean here is that children don’t want to cram every day full of activities – they actually like days when they can just be at home running, climbing, jumping, playing with their toys and just relaxing. So incorporate a little more playtime into your schedule.

But also think of their ‘playtime’ when you’re out and about. For example, when we go to do groceries, my boys are always attracted to the Thomas the Tank out the front of the supermarket. Now I could try and distract them from seeing Thomas and rush them into the store, or I can let them play on Thomas for 5 minutes and then pop them back into the trolley. Okay, our shopping trip takes a little longer, but I have happier children through the supermarket dash {even if I always say that Thomas is broken and won’t take my $2 coin}.

5. Eat dinner together

Sit down at the end of the day and appreciate your family. Now some days you’ll sit down to a lovely meal, with well behaved children and a husband who isn’t going to grumble over what you’ve whipped up. You’ll be able to sit down and ask everyone ‘what was the best part and the worst part of your day’. And you’ll smile at the cute things that come out of your child’s mouth.

But there will be days when it’s best to grab a hot chook and take dinner outside – picnic style – because even when your tantrum throwing children throw said chicken you won’t care as the maggies will come and eat it whilst your bathing the children and promptly putting them to bed.

Just know, that there was a part of your day when you all could sit down together and share what happened {even if it was for the briefest moment}.

So faithful readers, what are some of your tips for raising happy children? I am keen to hear tips to get through the terrible twos which I also hear just seem to get worse when your child actually turns three. 

Make sure to check this reference, where you will find the most popular games for 5th graders.
 

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Filed Under: life, motherhood Tagged With: dinner time, emotions, happiness, happymealtimes2016, motherhood, mummy blogger, playtime, raising children, vitamin D

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Comments

  1. sammie@theannoyedthyroid.com says

    February 21, 2016 at 11:58 pm

    Great tips – I love the idea of eating together and getting outside and a glorious hit of Vitamin D!

  2. Lozzie@MessyRainbows says

    February 20, 2016 at 3:41 pm

    Great list. I’m trying to spend more time outdoors & it’s the magic key that stops my youngest from whining all day 🙂 I’d love to eat dinner together at the table more often too but hubby & my eldest will just pick up their plates & go watch tv… So that ones still a work in progress. Hate to break it to you but twos are nothing compared to three & four… Nightmare!!

    • Shari from GoodFoodWeek says

      February 21, 2016 at 12:37 pm

      Thanks Lozzie. We have a no TV {like it can’t even be on} whilst we are eating dinner – it was something that I grew up with and I want for my family. We do sometimes listen to music and everyone gets to pick. Oh no, don’t tell me it gets worse 🙁

  3. shannon@ my2morrows says

    February 20, 2016 at 3:00 pm

    Lovely tips Shari. We’ve just started asking the kids for their top 3 favourite positive things from their day at the dinner table and so far it’s working really well. They get excited when they tell us and we get a whole lot more info out of them than if we just ask them ‘how was your day’. Happy kids =happy mumma! Xx

    • Shari from GoodFoodWeek says

      February 21, 2016 at 12:35 pm

      Thanks Shannon – I love hearing what my eldest has to say at the end of the day {and I can only imagine how good his answers will become as he gets older}.

  4. Simone Emery says

    February 19, 2016 at 7:51 pm

    Perfect tips! Well said ???

    • Shari from GoodFoodWeek says

      February 20, 2016 at 12:20 pm

      Thanks Simone 🙂

  5. Simone Emery says

    February 19, 2016 at 7:51 pm

    Perfect tips! Well said ???

Hi, I’m Shari Wakefield and I am the creative director and social media manager behind the food/lifestyle blog GoodFoodWeek. I’m a mum to four beautiful boys, who spends her days working in corporate communications and her nights cooking up a storm in her kitchen. We reside in Sydney, Australiaread more

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GoodFoodWeek started in 2008 as a way of sharing recipes with uni friends and family who were spread near and far. It has evolved over the years to contain my ramblings as I’ve searched for a house, planned the perfect veggie patch, stumbled through farmer’s markets with my eye half open (because you need to be there at 6am to get the fresh eggs), had babies, gathered family and friends around a shared table, laughed out loud and enjoyed life to the fullest! Read More…

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