1. Believe in yourself and be true to your ‘Mummystyle’.
You’ve done newborn before and you can do newborn again. I know that when it comes to having children they say ‘one is one, but two is twenty’, but you will find your groove. You might not be second guessing; whether you want to breast feed or bottle feed, whether you want baby to sleep in a bassinet next to your bed or in a cot in its own room, or whether you’ll be pureeing everything or taking the baby led weaning approach.
But you might find yourself with a whole new range of questions. Have I given enough attention to my newborn today? Have I given enough attention to my toddler today? Do my children watch too much TV? Does it matter that my toddler has eaten cereal for breakfast, lunch and dinner today? Have my household standards slipped? When will I find time to have one-on-one time with my husband?
Just like it took time to adjust to life with one, it will take time to adjust to life with two. You will find your way, just be true to your Mummystyle and don’t get caught up with what you see on social media. If you’ve never been a ‘crafty’ Mum then don’t set yourself a giant craft project week two of your newborn being home. If you’ve never been a ‘healthy food’ Mum don’t set yourself the task of making your toddler homemade muesli bars week three. And if you’ve never been an ‘early bird’ Mum then don’t set yourself the task of getting up at 5am to get in a load of washing, wash the floors and clean the bathrooms when you’ve been up settling and resettling your newborn and your toddler all night!
2. Don’t over commit yourself – some days it’s okay that everyone stays in their pj’s until Daddy gets home.
I like the idea of having all my babies close together, so that if I am having a bad day, we can all stay at home and be in our pjs until Daddy gets back to help. With two close together, you probably wont have to run other children around to school or preschool or after school commitments.
You might have made commitments for your toddler to attend a craft activities or music and story time at the library or Gymbaroo – and it is great to keep some sort of routine in your toddler’s life when baby number two arrives. But remember that the newborn stage is fleeting, so if you have to stay still and hibernate for a week or two in the beginning, everyone around you will understand.
3. Ask for help or accept help when offered.
A friend offers to make you dinner – say ‘YES’. Your Mum wants to pop around and mind the children so that you can have a shower or a nap – say ‘YES’. The neighbour from across the road rings the door to see if you’d like her to pick you up some bread and milk whilst she is down the road – say ‘YES’.
Think that anyone of these things would be nice when you are at home trying to learn the new task of being a Mum to two under two? Then don’t be afraid to ask for help!
We didn’t always do this job being so isolated. There is a saying ‘it takes a tribe to raise a child’. If you need help, ask for it. And if help is offered, accept it.
4. Pre make meals or snacks – I’m the queen of preparing dinner during afternoon nap times.
If you have the opportunity it might be nice to cook a few meals to have in the freezer when baby number two arrives. We all know that you’ll have ‘bad days’ and wouldn’t it be great to be able to not have to worry about cooking dinner on those nights?
Once you are in a routine with your little ones, I found it easier to prepare our meals or snacks whilst one or more of the children were sleeping. It was also great to have some one-on-one time with my toddler baking cupcakes or something for afternoon tea whilst the newborn was napping.
Here is a great nap time dinner prep recipe that is loved by toddlers and Mums alike: Veggie Frittata
5. Be grateful for the small wins.
You got a load of washing done today – take the win.
You managed to escape the house and have 30 minutes at the park with your toddler whilst your newborn napped in the pram – take the win.
You finally have everyone asleep. Well actually, you’re all in your bed and you’re reading this post on your iphone, and your other arm is asleep from being under your toddler – take the win.
Lauren Threadgate says
This is a great post!
I especially love the advice to accept help. It’s been one of my biggest hurdles, but also the most rewarding.
Thanks for sharing
Shari from GoodFoodWeek says
Thanks so much, Lauren. It’s always nice to know that your posts are appreciated.
Kell @ All Mum Said says
Fantastic tips! I have always just gone with the flow and I think it has made for less stressful days but sometimes things just get on top of you.
Taking the small wins is definitely one to implement!
Thanks for stopping by #MummyMondays blog linkup.
Shari from GoodFoodWeek says
So true – when I was asked about my breast feeding schedule, I said that I just fed my baby when they cried {on demand feeding I think it is called} – I couldn’t think of anything more stressful then listening to my baby cry for 20 minutes {or longer} as they woke early from their nap and it ‘wasn’t time to feed’.
I think that it is very important to try and just go with the flow – but we are all human and sometimes it just will get on top of you. Thanks for stopping by and commenting 🙂
Karin @ Calm to Conniption says
Great tips. I couldn’t do that close in ages but I guess if it had happened like that I just would have. Some days with a 3 year old and a newborn were hard enough!
Shari from GoodFoodWeek says
Thanks Karin. We shall see how it all goes with a three year old, a two year old and a newborn in a matter of weeks.
NormalNess says
I don’t have kids & I keep “bad day” meals in the freezer. It’s so nice to just plop something the oven or a pan for reheating and ignore that responsibility that day.
Shari from GoodFoodWeek says
I think that’s it is always nice to have a ‘bad day’ meal in the freezer no matter what life situation you are in 🙂
Mica says
Your babies are adorable! 🙂 I dfinitely agree with the advice to take it as easy as you can and not over commit yourself. With two under 2 I’ve let thing slide now and then – if we can’t get to the library for books and rhymes because I’ve had a rough night with them both and want to stay in PJs it’s okay, there is always another day to go 🙂 Snuggles at home are the best anyway!
Shari from GoodFoodWeek says
Oh, thanks so much, Mica. There is only the shortest amount of time that your babies fit perfectly into your arms and actually want to cuddle with you – so make the most of it, I say.
Ingrid says
My best tip is to try and keep them both in the same routine of napping at the same time to give yourself a break too.
Shari from GoodFoodWeek says
Yes – I wished that everyone continued to nap at the same time.
LydiaCLee says
Nice – I have three with big gaps and now that they’re well into school I find I have to premake meals so everyone can microwave their dinner while I’m driving others about…by high school the extra curricular has 9pm pick ups! So I can be taxi from 3pm to 9.30, driving back and forth getting kid 1 to one thing and kid 3 to another…
Shari from GoodFoodWeek says
How 9pm – that is quite late when you think about that most highschoolers’ days are beginning at around 7am? It seems like so far off for me and my family – although I am sure it will be here in no time.
[email protected] says
Love all those family snaps – I’ve got friends who have 2 close together and you’re totally right, it really does take a village! So excited that your little one is on the way, just remember three is a magic number!
Shari from GoodFoodWeek says
Thanks Sammie – it was a lot of fun looking through all the family photos to pick them out. Three is a magic number and I am so excited to be a Mum of 3!